How to make LIP (Low-Impact-Parenting) work for you. Tips for the lazy parent.

Being a stay-at-home mom, it was important to find ways to keep my kids happy with the absolute bare minimal amount of effort. That’s how my husband and I came up with Low-Impact-Parenting. It can bring a few tears at times, but oh well. Builds character. Here are a few of my favorites:
1. If your child has [...]

108,000 people have asked: Where’s my boob?

Don’t ask me why 108,000 people have watched this video, or why LaLeche of Italy used it for their annual conference (yes, they literally had to translate it). But, here it is. Back by popular demand, my husband and son doing their rendition of “Where’s My Boob?”
 
My son is now 2.5 and [...]

My hateful love affair with Trader Joe’s…and its patrons

Unfortunately, there are certain things you can only buy at Trader Joe’s. Decent wine that you don’t have to dip into your kid’s college fund for. Coffee that doesn’t cost $25 a pound and still tastes pretty good. Those little yogurts that my son eats for breakfast. The only yogurt he doesn’t turn his nose [...]

The art of bringing your uninvited kids to an adult dinner party

Friends of ours invited us to their adult dinner party Saturday night. They always have such a diverse group of people at their parties. Writers. Rafters. Photographers. Surfers.  You name it. They’ll be there. I can see it now. Conversations about current events instead of Spongebob. The entertainment industry instead of American Girl. Surfing stories instead of [...]

Don’t knock the knockers

I went to the doctor last month complaining I had a sore back and sore chest muscles. I let him know my self diagnosis when I walked in the room (I’m a bit of a hypochondriac): It’s scoliosis or breast cancer or some disease I can’t pronounce.
This doctor has seen me maybe once or twice before. But, [...]

FREAKIN’ TOYS! And I’m not talking about the sex kind.

Why do family members and friends insist on buying toys for your kids that make noise? I’ll tell you why. They don’t have kids. Or, they have kids that are grown and have forgotten how fucking annoying it is. Or, they just hate you. I’m guessing it’s that last one.
I can’t tell you how many [...]

Frumpy is as frumpy does

Five excuses…er…reasons I’ve converted from being fashionable to being frumpy:
1. It’s becoming more difficult to shower. My 2.5 year old son insists on coming into the bathroom with me, making snide remarks.
“Mom? That’s your butt.” “Mom? That’s your boobs.” “Mom? That’s your big belly.”
Um, thanks kid. Isn’t Dexter on TV? Remember, I want a written synopsis on my desk by [...]

EDDIE THE GUTTER MAN

Eddie the Gutter Man has been staying with us for the past five weeks.  Ironically, we live in Los Angeles and don’t have gutters.  We do have something that resembles a gutter, but it’s currently being used by our resident possum as a step ladder to get onto the roof. 
Truth be told, Eddie the Gutter [...]